Ireland needs to revamp the old Irish Independence Party to take the island out of the European Union.
In Britain, the United Kingdom Independence Party, UKIP, is the bookies' favourite to give Downing Street boss Dandy Dave Cameron a huge political bloody nose in next year's European poll.
While there's a strong chance UKIP will mop up many Eurosceptic Catholic and Protestant voters in the North, the party has little chance of making any inroads in the South.
The Emerald Isle has to face the bitter reality that the EU cash cow has been milked dry.
The crisis in the rapidly collapsing euro-zone means there'll be no more big grants for roads across the island.
And the final straw will come in June when the prestigious G8 conference of world leaders will be held in Fermanagh.
The G8 is expected to tell Ireland, the EU is bust and there's no more dosh for another bailout.
The main parties in the Republic don't want to admit they have screwed up the Celtic Tiger by relying too much on EU aid.
And, despite Shinner boss and Louth TD Gerry Adams leading Sinn Féin to its best Dáil showing since things erupted in the late 1960s, the party is still viewed as the IRA's political wing.
In the North, the comfy DUP/Shinner Stormont coalition will never rock the boat and risk Dandy Dave cutting off the money tap from Westminster.
There's only one workable solution. The people of Ireland will have to reform the Irish Independence Party (IIP) to lead the island out of the EU.
The IIP was a visionary movement launched in 1977 by top nationalists Frank McManus and Fergus McAteer.
It made major inroads into the SDLP vote, but the 1981 republican hunger strikes and Sinn Féin's emergence as a major electoral force signalled the IIP's death knell.
The real body blow came in 1980 when the UDA murdered its top strategist, the former Brit Army officer and leading Protestant nationalist Councillor John Turnly.
Had Turnly lived, there is every chance he would have eventually become deputy First Minister instead of the SDLP's Seamus Mallon in the first power-sharing Executive with former UUP chief Davy Trimble.
This year will be 'make or break' for the all-island Irish economy. Ireland and the UK will be forced to become givers of EU cash aid, rather than receivers.
Billions of euros are needed to keep other euro-zone states afloat. Bulgaria and Romania are joining the EU later this year and both will need hefty EU investment – money the North and South cannot afford.
The Emerald Isle must prepare for harsh political medicine. Its only option is to form a staunchly Euro-sceptic movement such as the IIP and campaign tirelessly to quit the EU. The EU gravy train has come to a grinding halt and like the Titanic, it is time to abandon ship. The Dáil must have the courage to bring back the once-proud Irish punt.
The Irish economy will never be kick-started while the seemingly endless 'brain drain' of people leaving the island continues.
So bring on the new IIP before we have to import large numbers of migrant workers from the rest of the EU simply to keep the country running.
Are you listening to me King Kenny in Dublin, and Robbo and Marty in Stormont? Don't be April Fools ...